I only purged part of my binge just now, which I’m sort of proud of. I have been trying really hard to eat healthy, but tonight I just went crazy. Spaghetti, pancakes, eggs, brownies, you name it, I eat it. I am happy though because I only get rid of the pancakes. I waited too long to purge, and instead of pushing and pushing myself I stopped and said “It’s okay. Just start over fresh tomorrow.”
I think I’m making progress :)
This morning is day 2 of getting up at 5h30 to work out. I’m soo tirreeddd. I downloaded some apps for my tablet and I’ve kept up with them so far. I’m using MyFitnessPal/Noom for logging workouts and food. And for exercise I’m using Workout Trainer/P90x. I’ll actually start P90x soon, once I’m in better shape. I can’t keep up with the workouts right now :( I really want to get this weight off without throwing up anymore, so I need to stay dedicated!
Now I have to catch up on all of my school work! I’m so behind! Good morning/good night everyone xx
too hungry to sleep.
and by recently I mean today. I went to the local Tabac and bought a pack of Marlboro Golds. So far so good I guess. It is disgusting, but by my second cigarette it was already easier. Night binging is my biggest problem and instead of eating the entire box of cookies I bought I just smoked a cigarette. Anytime I’m hungry and it’s not a meal-time I plan on smoking. I know it’s bad for me blah blah blah, but honestly the need to be skinny is more important to me. We’ll see how I feel tomorrow!
WHY DO I DO SUCH EMBARRASSING THINGS? whyyyyy
I finally received the sweatshirt I ordered in the mail today…but it doesn’t fit. It does technically, but it’s tighter than I’m used to and I’m so self-conscious I know I won’t wear it in public. It’s so cute too :(
I guess it’s just some more motivation!
ok i’ve done so many push ups, sit ups, and leg lifts; i’m off to bed now, good night everyone! xx
I had done so well today then I ruined it with a huge binge:(( Then I was going to purge it, but no matter how far I shoved my fingers down my throat nothing would come up. It’s kind of a good thing though because I haven’t purged in weeks but I just sdnglskdngvregfadfoxjwe. GAHHHHHHH.
Tomorrow will be better.
